A-Team (2010)
review by Illumin-Arte
Starring:
Liam Nesson – Colonel Hannibal Smith
Bradley Cooper – Face
Quniton Jackson – B.A.
Sharito Copley – Captain Murdock
Jessica Biel – Charissa Sosa
This review has been awhile in the making. SimplyKyle had originally asked me to do this review as kind of a comparison between movie and television show (yes I’m old enough to remember the show when it first premiered). The premise of the show was simple there were four men who were in the military together, who were falsely accused of a crime they committed under orders, arrested and escaped from prison and was now pursued across the country as fugitives of the law. Somehow, and I never quite understood how this entered into the scheme of things, they became modern day Robin Hoods and spend their time helping people with their outrageous problems, using handmade inventions ( I wonder if they were trained by McGuyver in the military), and they didn’t charge any money.
Watching this show I fondly remember that even though they made cannons out of old bicycles, and had machine guns made from old champagne bottles and cake pans (lol) they would have 15 minute shootouts and no one would die some shows not even a wounding, and the only time the bad guys would give up is when they were shot with a cotton candy gun, or a popcorn shooter, or a paint shooting cannon. It was pretty sad but people loved it young and old alike. The cast of the TV show were George Peppard as “Hannibal”, Dwight Shultz as “Murdock”, Mr T. as “B.A. (Bad Attitude) Baracus, and Dwight (Starbuck) Benedict as “Faceman”. The plot was thin ,the scripts even thinner, the fun was silly, and The tv action was full and never lacking it’s what kept bringing the fans back for 4 yrs. (1983 to 1987).
(my how the times have changed)
Now on to the big screen (in reality it was roughly a 6 inch screen on the back of a plane seat on my way home from England). Ok it was such a small screen on the plane, I felt in order to do the movie justice I watched it again on my 62 inch. you know what ? I still wasn’t that impressed.
Let’s start at the beginning. I thought the opening scene with Hannibal getting the shit kicked out him and handcuffing two rottweilers ( I think they were rots I don’t know they were dogs and big) together by their collars was bad, but when he came out of the shadows lighting a cigar and there wasn’t a mark on him, That was my first clue.
The second clue came with the meeting of Hannibal and B.A. (Boscoe) Baracus. Here is B.A. driving in the Mexican desert and he comes across Hannibal who proceeds to shoot B.A. in the arm. Hannibal sees a Ranger tattoo on B.A. and shows him his Ranger tattoo and now the shooting is forgotten and he will follow the man who shot him to the end of the world. They go and rescue Face who is working with Hannibal, and then for some reason they need a copter, so they stop to get Murdock out of a mental ward (how they got his name and why they go for a nut with a death wish I haven’t figured out) and during all these first time meetings they kept lifting their shirt sleeves and showing tattoos like it had some kind of hypnotic powers, or some kind of charisma spell cast on it by a wizard, (these are not the droids you looking for, or, I am not the man who just shot you, follow me, follow me).
The rest of the movie is just as sad. At one point they even tried to show the sensitive side of B.A. reading oriental philosophy and quoting Ghandi.
(I pity the fool who ain’t in touch with his spiritual side!)
The weak story line, and poor character development, made the whole movie hard to get into. So they really had no choice but to rely on outrageous action scenes and a pathetic attempt at humor to carry it. The problem with to many action scenes is they have a tendency for jumpy camera shots, and spastic editing, making it hard to follow without getting dizzy and sometimes if your prone to car sickness a slight turning of the tummy. The ending of the movie was so garbled with action and a choppy attempt at a sting operation when it finally finished you didn’t really care. I thought before I saw the movie that it had potential, especially when I saw Liam Neeson as Hannibal. The other cast members had some potential they are Bradley Cooper as Face, Quinton Jackson as B.A. Baracus ,and a semi exceptional performance by Sharlto Copley as Howling Mad Murdock, I was wrong, and they were two dimensional.
All in all my suggestion to you is if you want to experience the A-Team please rent a box set of the original series put on your Members Only jacket, grab a Coke Classic, put on the sunglasses you only wear at night, and enjoy. Unfortunately this is one plan that didn’t come together.
I give this movie 2 1/2 bums up.
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(guess which one)
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